“ But when we finally get them, when we’re with that person whom we’ve chosen to be there for everything from poorly-lit daytime sex to arguing over how to fold the hand towels, how can we be sure that we’re fitting them, too? They certainly have a space to be taken up, and are we really filling out the corners? Is that space going to change over time, and our rigid sides will no longer fit the way they used to? It’s a terrifying notion, this idea that we walk around with needs to be met and quotas to be reached, expecting someone else to smooth out our edges and adapt to fit the same position, even as we change. It seems set up to fail. And seeing two people who have managed to be strong where the other is weak — to complete them the way we’d all love to be completed — fills one with a combination of jealousy and confusion. How is this even possible?